From A to Zee

Two days ago, I was in my favorite place to be on campus.  I was sitting in Maria Smith’s office relaxing between my classes with Julie Baker.  We were all chatting as usual but this particular day I had the urge to write down about.  So just go with me on this.

The conversation had drifted to the fact that Julie Baker wasn’t going to help with the wedding, due to some other plans that she had already made.  She told Maria, “Please don’t kill me… but I won’t be able to help out with the wedding on Saturday.”  Maria, of course understood.

Maria began telling the two of us, that she is greatful that we are such committed members of the chapel choir, to the extent that we do so much for her that we help lift stress from her. “BUT!” She warned us, “I don’t ever want you to feel like you have a burden; I don’t want you to feel like you HAVE to be obligated to helping out, because once that happens you are no longer helping for the right reasons.  I want you to help, because you love it.  I say that, because above everything else…

I don’t want to lose you.”

As she said those words, she began to tear up. It made me feel the love that she gives to all.  I remember last semester, I was everywhere.  I was taking 16 hours of upper level classes, I had work-study job for the Registrar’s Office, I had a second job where I was a campus director for a tutoring program called Group Excellence, and I was a member of the mathematics club.  I tried my hardest to keep chapel choir in my schedule, but even that was too difficult. Maria saw my stress levels rise and fall, she was there when I needed to vent, she was there when I wanted to put everything on pause (even if it was just for a few minutes), she was there when I needed her most.

What Maria probably didn’t realize (but I’m sure she does now) was the fact that she was one of the main reasons I survived last semester.  As you can see, my plate was clearly full. But because of her love for me, I knew I always had a place that I could escape to.  Chapel Choir is my escape.  It is my time to forget everything else and be at peace.  I go to both practices and I go to both masses (when I can) because I can’t get enough of it.  I love it so much, I know I’d be lost without it.  I am as committed as Maria says I am, because I love the singing, the people, the love that the chapel choir has to offer.  No force, on earth will keep me from my chapel choir family.  As far as St. Mary’s comes around, those people are my priority, whether I am close to them or not.  If any of them need to talk, I will always be there for them, in a heartbeat.  

So Maria, with that being said, I hope you are aware that you won’t lose me.  My love for chapel choir is so great that even last semester I desperately wanted to find a way to keep going.  Please know, that because of your own love, attitude, and commitment, we are all where we are today.  Because of your love, attitude, and commitment, I have found a place that I can call my “home away from home.”  Because of you, I have grown further in my faith, because you model that for me.  Because of you, I promise you, I’m not going anywhere.

-Zee